What is Love?

Definitely not something i can define :( But why did this question pop up now?!
Something reminded me of the day I proposed her... for the second time! The memories of it used to be pretty hurting earlier. Slowly they turned out to be a little embarassing to myself. Coz I felt all that I did was pure nonsense and stupid. Now they seem a little funny. Like preserved records of my craziness. Make me laugh at myself.

The propossal kinda went like this.

I call her up. She already kind of knows why I called her since I just sent her a msg asking can I speak to u now? Stupid, isn't it? To ask someone if I can call her? well.. its not a secret that I'm stupid. anyways, she picks up the call and asks me "what?" I'm kinda nervous and dont say anythin for a while. She says dont be nervous. But I already am nervous! can't help it.
K.. I start something like.. you know I love you. She says something like: yea.. but what do you mean by u love me? I definitely didn't expect this, though I shud have. fine.. I say I feel like I can do anything for her but I don't feel the same for anyone else. She asks me: what so you mean by you can do anything for me?"
well.. it's true that I feel like that. but I myself dunno what it is! crap.. so I say, "I dunno. mybe that's not true. but I just feel like that." Such a stupid answer isn't it?
I say I miss her all the time she isn't around. So I cant concentrate on anything and blah blah... She asks me "why? we didn't interact much. its understandable if someone misses a person with whom he interacts regularly. but why do you miss me?" hmm.. I kno she's a lot brainy than I'm. But shud she ask all these questions? well, it's tough to answer many questions, particularly when u r nervous.
I try to explain her how I feel about her. But well, I rarely speak. And if I speak, it's usally some technical stuff that I can easily bluff about. which doesn't use up my brain cycles for thinking. now imagine how horrible I'd be putting into words some feelings that can only be felt by myself! .. that's what happened. she said, I don't understand ur feelings. I'dn't blame her for not understanding. coz I know the connection between my mind and my voice is screwed up ;) As a matter of fact, I can't remember a single instance where I was sucessful at explaining anything to anyone.
So it goes on for a little while. I knew her answer already. A simple NO. I knew I cant take that answer easy. A little sensitive stupid that I'm. I knew the answer, I knew it'd hurt me. but still I dared asking! not to say I'm courageous. but to say that it shows how stupid I was (or am!). K.. so it did end on a bad note :((
But after that I'm left with a lot of questions. The most important being What the hell is love? I still don't know the answer. In fact I began to doubt if it's really love. I even tried to convince myself that its not love but haven't been sucessful in that either :( I kept asking myself the question for about a week hoping to find an answer, but in vain. And I still don't know what's that 'anything' I was ready to do for her. :D
I initially thought I can somehow invoke the genius inside me to find answer for all these questions and get back to her with some good answers. But after two weeks, my brain returns me a NoGeniusFoundException. I shud have expected that too. But well.. finally I gave up trying to find any answers that might be lurking somewhere around.. ;)
I once used to think that Love made me stupid. Well, now I kno stupidity resides in my DNA and so I've learnt that I shud accept that. At least until a few years when all the science fictions become true and I'd be able to mutate myself ;)

Okay, back to the initial question of What is Love. Not that I know the answer. But now that the level of my craziness has come down a notch and that I've a little free time now (its a Saturday after all), I thought why not try again to find the hidden answers lurking around. And I found something that's closer to an answer, but not satisfactory. At least not to me.
Looking back at my past behaviour, and assuming it was really Love, "I'd say it's Love when you like someone for a reason that either doesn't exist or you don't know. It's when you like someone unconditionally and ideally without any expectations."
I say ideally coz I don't think mine was ideal coz I expected her to be in love with me, though I knew very well that me loving someone doesn't neccessarily mean the other way around. Setting expectations on anything does hurt when the expectations go awry. Particularly to someone hypersensitive like me. Or rather a stupid like me who expects everything to go as per his expectations.
Fine.. all of this definition and all the philosophy was assuming I was really in love. I'm trying to convince myself otherwise, but haven't been successful yet, though it's been long since this happened. Well.. 2 months becomes pretty long when things get screwed up to the extent that you're no more in speaking terms with the one you love the most. ;)
K.. what if you find out later that I wasn't in love? Well.. the definition still holds good, but the LHS should be changed to craziness. This definition would then be for craziness and remeber to watchout for these symptoms, or you might end up in a lunatic assylum ;)

K.. will be back here with a more sensible topic (technical I mean) :)